Time to let it go

Tonight is the Varsity Christian Fellowship AGM. However, I won't be going down. It's been two years since I've graduated from NUS and it really seems like yesterday. Two years ago I was in Boston on pretty much a graduation trip, now I waiting for my marking load to arrive in a little over 12 hours. 

The VCF days were well spent ones, ones where I had to let go of church committments to gain a greater understanding of ministry and service. It served me well. There are many things I will look back with fondness of my VCF days, but it is time to say goodbye to those days. So, my absence from the AGM is a way of telling me to say goodbye to that past. A past that does have some very painful memories. One that I wish to forget, yet I know I never will. 

The NIE trainees are back at NIE. It was a year ago when I was in their shoes. All eager and enthusiastic to start work in a new school. But a year on and things have changed. The whole complexion of the ministry has changed. To be a point of difference, that was my post a year ago, but now, trying to be different is a bed of nails. Yet I know I must love to break a world indifferent. 

So once again, I had to let go of church committments to take on greater ones. The whole purpose is to be more effective in my new ministry, yet I am not effective. Neither in church or school. So what's the purpose of all this? It's time for another long walk I guess. Decided to take a long cycle along East Coast Park just now, the scene of my long walk almost 4 years ago. But I know the Lord will be silent for another 6 months at least. Where do I go from here? Nowhere. I will stay. 

It is very different to sing "Declare His glory" as a student and again as a working adult. It makes a lot more sense now. 

For the earth will be filled with the knowledge of the glory of the Lord as the waters cover the sea.  - Habbakuk 2:14