This was posted way back in April but deleted it as I felt some of the things I wrote were really inappropriate. I guess it's about time I reposted it. But minus the things that are no longer that applicable. It's strange that I wrote this 2 months ago, and as I read it again now, it can still be read, but in a different light, especially after Go4th.
And what's different? Well, I've not been dreaming bad dreams; Shaun's vision is 2 months old and it's true meaning has already been revealed. I lost my voice 2 months ago, and so my voice is working well and I am not sick at the moment.
But the thing that has not changed is this "joy" that I've found. And that is the joy of salvation through Jesus Christ who shed His blood on the cross.
Well, there are no hidden meanings behind the words of this post. They are face value. So try not to read to hard. All I want to say is the Gospel has the power to set you free from the bondages of the devil; and that I have surrendered a very large aspect of my life to Him. And He is just so faithful and forgiving. So, here it goes:
Inside of meWhat a joy I've found
Since You've filled me with Your Spirit
You took me and You gave me liberty
What a peace I've known
Since You made my heart Your home
You changed my life
And now I've been set free
I've got destiny and purpose
I've got everything I need
'Cause His love is everlasting
And His Spirit sets me free
I've got joy that lasts forever
And a peace you can't conceive
'Cause Jesus
He lives inside of me!!!!
(C) Words and music by Henry Seeley
"Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty" - 2 Corinthians 3:17
It's been an exciting Monday. I guess more than anything, I have really come to see the goodness of God, and the power of what the Holy Spirit can do. I've found that joy in my heart again. The joy of my salvation.
I guess I woke up this morning, wanting to post "Diary" by Bread, or "I will sing" by Don Moen. Some pretty depressing songs, but I can do otherwise tonight. (NOTE: this was 2 months ago)
The Holy Spirit give liberty. Freedom. Freedom from what?
Freedom from pain and anger? No.
Freedom from trails and temptations? No.
Freedom from sexual sins? No.
Freedom from hurt and pain? No.
Freedom from heartbreaks? No!
Freedom from the government? No.
Then freedom from what?
Freedom from sin, and eternal condemnation. Through the blood of Jesus.
Without the Cross of the Cruxifiction, the death of Jesus, His ressurection and His ascension, the Holy Spirit would not have come. Causality, cause and effect.
In the past few months, its been a hellish journey for me. And I have tried my best to keep the focus back on the cross, to see Jesus and remember the covering of His blood for me. That which saves me from condemnation. By the grace of God I've pulled through. Joy is coming back into my heart. Happiness and liberty. The past few weeks immedaitely after the musical, when I was tired and worn out, the devil took his chance and attacked. My dreams have been very dark recently, dreaming of a lot of bad stuff. And Shaun's vision of me really didn't help. But it was God warning me that I was under a spiritual attack, and I had to put up the defences fast. I've been sick for the past 2 weeks, I lost my voice, but things are finally getting brighter. I'm still sick, I won't recover overnight, but I am feeling better already. (NOTE: this was immediately after Falling Spinning)
Wrote this in my private journal on 22 March, before the preview of the Falling Spinning musical to the VCFers. "I guess final surrender is hard, but I'm getting there slowly. More than just letting go and moving on, I guess. There is something more to life than just going after the one you love. It is about running back to the First Love."
Closure has finally come. I guess as the Holy Spirit guided, I've finally found my way back to Him. I've grown; God dealt with me. And I have found Him again, where He always has been, in my heart. And I can only be grateful to God, for what has happened. I will not have it, any other way.
That is the end of the original post. Well, closure has come. But a much different kind of closure this time. But at the same time, new doors were opened. No, they were always open, it's just that I had in my selfishness shut them. But God forgives, and makes the blind to see again.
